Aladdin: XMen Style
by Pip the MiT Squeak
Summary: Pretty much what the title says...Gambit Remy is Aladdin, Rogue is Jasmine...a complete cast listing inside. Please Read and Review!
1. Chapter 1

Okay, so this is an X-Men version of the Disney movie, Aladdin. If you see anybody that you recognize, I don't own anything…except for Allison and Leah, who I co-own with my friend who helped me write this, and came up with the idea in the first place. I did use some of the lines from the movie, and the entire plot, so there's my disclaimer for the entire fanfic, don't sue me. I don't have enough money for a lawyer.

Cast list:

Aladdin-Gambit/Remy LeBeau

Jasmine-Rogue

Genie-Wolverine/Logan

Rajah-Jean Grey/Phoenix

Abu-Young Store (the way Gambit found her in Cairo when the Nanny changed her)

Jafar-Magneto

Iago-Pietro

The Sultan-Professor Xavier

Gazeem-Toad

Head Guard-Scott/Cyclops

Palace Guards-The Brown Noser Squad

Narrators at the Beginning of the story-Allison and Leah, two mutants who live at the X-Mansion

Prince-Joseph

Cave of Wonders-itself.

Well, that's the cast list. If I've forgotten any, you should be able to figure it out…oh, and it's written in script-style, and I got the entire script by googleing a website…so that really is it.


	2. Chapter 2

**Allison and Leah**:

Oh we come from a land

From a faraway place

Where young mutants play and roam

Where Colossus is immense

And the fighting is intense

It's barbaric, but hey--it's home!

When the wind's at your back

And the sun's from the west

And your genes have mutated right…

Come on down,

Stop on by

Sprout some wings and fly

To the X-Mansion, mutant high!

X-men fights

Like X-men dates

More often than not

Are hotter than hot

in a lot of good ways!

X-men fights

In the danger room

A fool off his guard

Could fall and fall hard

In there to his doom!

**Allison**: Hey, how's it going?

**Leah**: Good evening! Come a little bit closer! (camera zooms in and hits them)

**Allison**: That's a little too close… (camera zooms out) There we go! Welcome to New York in Westchester county-

**Leah**: Home of the X-Men!

**Allison**: Anyways there's a lot of cool stuff here…including this image inducer! (holds up image inducer) Leah, demonstrate.

**Leah**: (puts on image inducer on and changes into Allison and back) Made by Shi'ar technology, the finest! (takes it off) It's virtually indestructible! (Bangs it against table) See?

**Allison**: (kinda nudging Leah with elbow) Ummm, maybe you shouldn't do that…

**Leah**: Nonsense! (drops the image inducer, it blows up) …shitshit…is it supposed to do that?

**Allison**: I don't think so…Oh! Look at this! A can of Flarp! (pulls out flarp) I've never seen one of these intact before! Listen. (sticks thumb in jar and it makes a farting noise) Ah, still good.

(camera starts to leave)

**Leah**: Wait! Don't go! I can see you want to see the really good stuff! (pulls out flarp and makes a bigger farting noise)

(camera starts to leave again)

**Allison**: WAIT! Hey Leah, should we show…it…to them?

**Leah**:…yeah…

**Allison**: We can see that you are interested in only…exceptionally rare items…

**Leah**: I think you'd like it if you'd stop and consider this…(sticks hand in pocket and starts digging around for stuff) …hang on… (Takes out a deck of cards, then a pencil, a pen, an eraser, a notebook, a lamp, a teapot, a shotgun, and more random stuff) …almost there…oh, I wondered where I put that…Here we go! (pulls out a lighter) Do not be fooled by it's common appearance! Like Nightcrawler, It is not what is on the outside, but on the inside that counts.

(camera starts to leave again)

**Allison**: Wait, this is no ordinary lighter! It once changed the course of a young man's life. He was like this lighter, more than what he seemed.

**Leah**: A diamond in the rough.

**Allison**: Do you want to hear the story? (flicks open the lighter)

It begins on a dark night, where a dark man waits, with a dark purpose…

**Magneto**: You…are late.

**Toad**: A thousand apologies master, generous, patient master.

**Magneto**: Do you have it?

**Toad**: Of course master! Faithful Toad has brought it to master! (Drives over a big rig with half of a Sentinel.) Wait master, what about the reward?

**Magneto**: Trust me, you will get what's coming to you.

**Pietro** : What's coming to you!

(Magneto uses his power to bring up the other half of the sentinel and connects them. The sentinel's eyes light up and it flies toward the dunes)

**Magneto**: Quickly! Follow the trail!

(Magneto uses his powers to make him and Toad fly after the sentinel, Pietro runs. The sentinel separates into two and the halves plunge into the dune. All that remains are two glowing

points of light on the dune. But then the dune begins to rise

up, transforming into a giant lion's head, with the glowing

points serving as the eyes. )

**Magneto**: At last, after all my years of searching, the cave

of wonders!

**Pietro**: Cave of wonders!

**Toad**: o.O Master! Look!

**Magneto**: Now, remember! Bring me the lighter. The rest of the

treasure is yours, but the lighter is mine!

(Toad starts to approach the lion's mouth, which forms the

entrance to the cave. He chuckles as he goes.)

**Pietro**: The lighter! The lighter! Father, where'd you dig this loser up?

(Magneto puts his finger to his lips and shushes him. Toad reaches

the cave, but is blown away by the roar of the cave's speaking.)

**Cave**: Who disturbs my slumber?

Toad: It is I, Toad, a humble mutant.

**Cave**: Know this. Only one may enter here. One whose

worth lies far within. A diamond in the rough.

(Toad turns to Magneto with a questioning look.)

**Magneto**: What are you waiting for? Go on!

(Toad hesitates, then moves one foot inside the cave. With

great apprehension, he plants his foot down. Nothing happens.

Relieved, he begins his trek again. Then another roar comes.

He turns back, but the lion's mouth slams shut and the dune

collapses back to normal. All that are left are Magneto, Pietro,

and the two separated halves of the medallion.)

**Cave**: Seek thee out, the diamond in the rough.

(Pietro unburied himself from the sand, coughing as he does so.)

**Pietro**: I can't believe it. I just don't believe it. We're

never gonna get a hold of that stupid lighter! Just

forget it. Look at this. Look at this. I'm so

ticked off that I'm getting leg cramps! (He runs up to

Magneto.)

**Magneto**: Patience, Pietro. Patience. Toad was obviously

less than worthy.

**Pietro**: (Extremely sarcastically) Oh, there's a big

surprise. That's an incred--I think I'm gonna have

a heart attack and die from not surprise! What're

we gonna do? We got a big problem here, a big prob-

(Magneto holds up his hand.)

**Magneto**: Yes, we do. Only one may enter. I must find this

one, this...diamond in the rough.


	3. Chapter 3

(Cut to a rooftop, where Gambit rushes up to the edge, carrying

a loaf of bread. He almost drops it over the edge.)

**Scott**: Stop, thief! I'll have your hands for a trophy,

swamp rat!

**Gambit**: (Looks back, then down, then at the bread.) All

this for a loaf of bread?

(He jumps off, landing on two ropes strung between buildings, with

drying clothes on them. He skies down them, collecting bits

and pieces of clothing on him as he goes. Finally, he's

nearing the end of the rope, at a window, when a woman reaches

out and slams the shutters closed. Gambit slams into the

shutters and falls to the street, his fall being broken by

numerous awnings and the pile of clothes around him. He pulls

off the top layer of clothes and is about to enjoy his bread

when...)

**Scott**: There he is!

**Bobby**: You won't get away so easy!

**Gambit**: You think that was easy?

(He looks at three women, laughing at him.)

**Scott**: You two, over that way, and you, with me. We'll

find him.

(Gambit puts on a disguise.

He rushes over to the women.)

**Gambit**: Morning, ladies.

**WOMAN 1**: Getting into trouble a little early today, aren't

we Gambit?

**Gambit**: Trouble? No way. You're only in trouble if you

get caught--

(A hand grabs Gambit's shoulder and yanks him back. It's Scott. Gambit's disguise falls off.)

**Gambit**: I'm in trouble!

**Scott**: ...and this time--(A lightning bolt from Storm,

then Scott's visor comes off. Storm dances above Scott's head, laughing.)

**Gambit**: Perfect timing, Stormy!

**Storm**: Hello!

**Gambit**: Gotta keep  
One jump ahead of the breadline  
One swing ahead of the sword  
I steal only what I can't afford  
( And That's Everything! )

One jump ahead of the lawmen  
That's all, and that's no joke  
These guys don't appreciate I'm broke

**Random Brown Nosers**: Riffraff! Swamp rat! Scoundrel! Take that!

**Gambit**: Just a little snack, guys  
**Scott**: Rip him open, take it back, guys  
**Gambit**: I can take a hint, gotta face the facts  
You're my only friend, Stormy!  
**Storm**: Wheee!

**Random Chicks**: Oh it's that Remy's hit the bottom.  
He's become a one-man rise in crime  
**Old Lady**: I'd blame parents except he hasn't got 'em  
**Gambit**: Gotta eat to live, gotta steal to eat  
Tell you all about it when I got the time!

One jump ahead of the slowpokes  
One skip ahead of my doom  
Next time gonna use a nom de plume  
One jump ahead of the hit men  
One hit ahead of the flock  
I think I'll take a stroll around the block

**Random Brown Nosers**: Stop, thief! Vandal! Outrage! Scandal!

**Gambit**: Let's not be too hasty  
**Leah**: Still I think he's rather tasty  
**Gambit**: Gotta eat to live, gotta steal to eat  
Otherwise we'd get along  
**Brown Nosers**: Wrong!

**Gambit**: One jump ahead of the trucks

(Vandal!)  
One hop ahead of the hoard  
(Swamp rat!)  
One trick ahead of disaster  
(Scoundrel!)  
They're quick, but I'm much faster  
(Take that!)  
Here goes, better throw my hand in  
Wish me happy landin'  
All I gotta do is jump

Gambit escapes by way of his mad skills and **BO-STAFF**!

(The Brown Nosers follow him out the window, but they go straight down to

the street, and land in a pile. Gambit uses the carpet as a parachute

to land safely and out of danger. Gambit and Storm high-five each

other.)

**Gambit**: And now, esteemed effendi, we feast! All right!

(Gambit breaks the bread in two and gives half to Storm, who begins

to eat. But Gambit looks over and sees two young children

rummaging through the garbage for food. The GIRL sees him, then

drops her find and tries to hide. Gambit looks at them, then

the bread, then at Storm.)

**Storm**: Uh-oh!

(Storm takes a big bite of his food, but Gambit gets up and walks

over to the children. The GIRL pulls her brother back.)

**Gambit**: Here, go on--take it.

(The children giggle with delight. Storm tries to swallow his bite,

then looks guilty. He walks over to the children and offers his

bread to them. In delight, they pet him on the head.)

**Storm**: Ah, don't. Huh?

(Storm sees Gambit walking into the daylight, where there is a parade

going on. Gambit peers over the shoulders of people. He sees

Joseph riding on a horse.)

**BYSTANDER 1**: On his way to the mansion, I suppose.

**BYSTANDER 2**: Another suitor for Rouge.

(Gambit is startled as the two children come running out from the

alley. The BOY runs out in front of Joseph's horse,

startling it.)

**Joseph**: Out of my way, you filthy brat!

(The Joseph brings up his whip to attack the children, but Gambit

jumps in front of them and catches the whip.)

**Gambit**: Hey, if I were as rich as you, I could afford some manners

**Joseph**: Oh—I'll teach you some manners!

(Joseph kicks Gambit into a mud puddle. The crowd laugh at him.)

**Gambit**: Look at dat, Stormy... It's not every day you see a

horse with two rear ends!

(Joseph stops and turns back to Gambit.)

**Joseph**: You are a worthless swamp rat. You were born a

swamp rat, you'll die a swamp rat, and only

your fleas will mourn you.

(Gambit rushes Joseph, but the gates to the mansion slam shut

in his face.)

**Gambit**: I'm not worthless. And I don't have fleas. Come

on, Storm. Let's go home.

(Gambit makes the climb to his home with the view, then tucks in

Storm for the night.)

**Gambit**: Riffraff, swamp rat.

I don't buy that.

If only they'd look closer

Would they see a poor boy? No siree.

They'd find out, there's so much more to me.

(He pulls back a curtain to reveal the beautiful X-Mansion.)

Someday, Storm, things are gonna change. We'll be

rich, live in a mansion, and never have any problems

at all.

(Dissolve to same shot during day. Cut to int. of Cerebro's chamber.

The door bursts open, and Joseph storms in, missing the

rear end of his pants.)

**Joseph**: I've never been so insulted!

**Xavier**: Oh, Joseph. You're not leaving so soon, are

you?

**Joseph**: Good luck marrying her off!

**Xavier**: Oh, Rouge! Rouge! Rouge! (Xavier goes off into the garden looking for Rouge. He finds her, but is interrupted by Jean, who blocks him off. Jean has a piece of Joseph's under shorts floating in the air. Xavier grabs the cloth and yanks it out of the air.)

Confound it, Jean! So, this is why Joseph stormed out!

**Rouge**: Oh, Professor. Jean was just playing with him,

weren't you Jean. (Jean comes over and allows Rouge to hug her.) You were just playing

with that overdressed, self-absorbed Joseph,

weren't you? (She high fives Jean, until she looks up at Xavier. )

Ahem.

**Xavier**: Rouge, you've got to stop rejecting every suitor

that comes to call. The law says you...

**Both**: ...must be married to a prince.

(They walk over to a dove cage.)

**Xavier**: By your next birthday.

**Rouge**: The law is wrong.

**Xavier**: You've only got three more days!

**Rouge**: Professor, I hate being forced into this. (She takes

a dove out of the cage and pets it.) If I do marry,

I want it to be for love.

**Xavier**: Rogue, it's not only this law. (She hands him

the dove, and he puts it back in the cage.) I'm not

going to be around forever, and I just want to make

sure you're taken care of, provided for.

**Rouge**: Try to understand. I've never done a thing on my

own. (She swirls her finger in the water of the

pond, petting the fish.)I've never had any real

friends. (Jean looks up at her and glares.)

Except you, Jean. (Satisfied, she goes back to

sleep.) I've never even been outside the mansion

walls.

**Xavier**: But Rouge, you're a princess.

**Rouge**: Then maybe I don't want to be a princess. (She

splashes the water.)

**Xavier**: Oooohhh! Heaven forbid you should have any

daughters!

(Jean looks up and thinks for a second. Rouge goes to the dove

cage and yanks open the door. The birds fly off into freedom.

She watches them go. No symbolism there at all. )


	4. Chapter 4

(Cut to int. of Cerebro's chambers.)

**Xavier**: I don't know where she gets it from. (A shadow falls over him.

He looks up startled and sees Magnet.) Ooh, oh.

Ah, Erik--my most trusted advisor. I am in

desperate need of your wisdom.

**Magneto**: My life is but to serve you, and your mutant dream Xavier.

**Xavier**: It's this suitor business. Rouge refuses to

choose a husband. I'm at my wit's-end.

**Pietro**: Wit's-end.

**Xavier**: Oh, ha ha. Have a blow pop Pietro! (He

pulls a blow pop out from his wheel chair. Pietro looks

terrified. Then Xavier stuffs it in Pietro's

mouth. Pietro grimaces as he tries to eat it. Magneto

and the Xavier both laugh.)

**Magneto**: You certainly has a way with dumb mutants.

(Pietro glares at him.) Now then, perhaps I can

divine a solution to this thorny problem.

**Xavier**: If anyone can help, it's you.

**Magneto**: Ah, but it would require the use of Cerebro.

**Xavier**: Uh, Cerebro? But it's extremely dangerous.

**Magneto**: It is necessary to find Rouge a suitor.

(Magneto pulls up a hypnosis thing) Don't worry. Everything

will be fine.

**Xavier**: Everything...will be...fine.

**Magneto**: Cerebro.

**Xavier**: Here, Erik. Whatever you need will be fine.

(Xavier opens up Cerebro. The room returns to normal as Magnus puts away hypnosis thingy.)

**Magnus**: You are most gracious, Xavier. Now run along and

play with your little mutants.

**Xavier**: (Still hypnotized) Yes...that'll be...pretty good.

(Magneto and Pietro exit. We follow them. When they're out of the room,

Pietro spits out the Blow Pop.)

**Pietro**: I can't take it anymore! If I gotta choke down on

one more of those nasty, disgusting Blow Pops...bam!

Whack!

(Magneto uses his powers to reveal a hidden entrance to his chambers.)

**Magneto**: Calm yourself, Pietro.

**Pietro**: Then I'd grab him around the head. Whack! Whack!

**Magneto**: (Speaking over Pietro.) Soon, I will be head of the Mansion, not that addlepated twit.

**Pietro**: And then I stuff the Blow Pop down his throat! Ha

ha!

(The pair pass through a door and slam it shut. Diss. to ext. gardens

at night. A shadowy figure walks through. We see it is Rouge

in disguise. She reaches the palace wall, then begins to climb it.

She is tugged from behind telepathically by Jean.)

**Rouge**: Oh, I'm sorry, Jean. But I can't stay here and

have my life lived for me. I'll miss you.(She

begins to climb again, and is helped up telekinetically by Jean) Good bye!


	5. Chapter 5

(Rogue disappears over the wall. Cut to daytime on the street Gambit and Storm are up to their capers again. They are on top of the awning of a fruit stand.)

**Gambit**: Okay, Stormy. Go!

(Storm dips over the edge and looks at White Queen)

**White Queen aka Emma** : (To passing crowd, while mind zapping them to make them buy her fruit) Try this, your taste buds  
will dance and sing! (Storm grabs a melon and  
hangs there, distracting her attention.) Hey,  
get your filthy mitts off that!

**Storm**: Blah blah blah!  
**Emma**: Why, you! Get away from here, you dirty girl!

(She telepathically grabs the melon away from Storm. But in the foreground, Gambit  
dips down and snatches another melon from the stand.)

**Storm**: Bye bye!

(He zings back up. White Queen takes the melon to the front,  
where she places it on top of a stack. She looks confused, like  
she has just done this.)

**Gambit**: Nice goin' Storm. Breakfast is served.

(Gambit and Storm on the roof break open the melon and eat. We see  
Rogue walking through the street.)

**Kitty**: Pretty lady, buy a pot. No finer pot in brass  
or silver.  
**Colossus**: Sugar dates, sugar dates and figs! Sugar  
dates and pistachios!  
**Forge**: Would the lady like a necklace. A pretty  
necklace for a pretty lady.

(She is charmed by the action, but is startled by a fish thrust  
into her face.)

**Beast**: Fresh fish! We catch 'em, you buy 'em!  
**Rogue**: I don't think so. (She backs away, but bumps into  
that wacky Auzzie Pyro, who is startled into swallowing his  
fire.) Oh, excuse me. (He gulps, then belches  
fire from his mouth. Rogue is disgusted. He is  
pleased and taps his stomach. Gambit sees her,  
and a strange look comes over his face.) I'm  
really very sorry.  
**Gambit**: (He's obviously deeply in love with her.) Mon dieu!

(She pulls the hood of her cloak over her head. Storm sees him and  
jumps up on his shoulder, waving his hand in front of Gambit's  
face.)

**Storm**: Uh oh. Hello? Hello?

(Rogue stops at the fruit stand and sees a young homeless child, Leech  
reaching for a piece of fruit. She picks one up and gives it to  
him.)

**Rogue**: Oh, you must be hungry. Here you go. (The mutant  
boy runs off.)  
**Juggernaut**: You'd better be able to pay for that.  
**Rogue**: (Mystified) Pay?  
**Juggernaut**: No one steals from my cart! I'm the Juggernaut bitch!  
**Rogue**: Oh, I'm sorry sir. I don't have any money.  
**Juggernaut**: Thief!  
**Rogue**: Please, if you let me go to the mansion, I can  
get some from the Professor.  
**Juggernaut**: Do you know what the penalty is for stealing?

(He takes her hand and pins it down on the table, intending to  
crush it with his other fist.)

**Rogue**: No, no please!

(The fist drops, but his hand is stopped by Gambit's _**BO-STAFF**_.)

**Gambit**: Thank you kind sir. I'm so glad you've found  
her. I've been looking all over for you.  
**Rogue**: (whispering) What are you doing?  
**Gambit**: (whispering back) Just play along.  
**Juggernaut**: You know this girl?  
**Gambit**: Sadly, yes. She is my sister. She's a little  
crazy. (He circles his finger around his ear.  
She is shocked. The Juggernaut grabs him by  
the trench coat.)  
**Juggernaut**: She said she knows the Professor!  
**Gambit**: She thinks petite is the Professor.  
(Storm is picking a pocket. She hears this, then straightens up.  
Rogue, playing along, bows to Storm.)  
**Rogue**: Oh, wise Professor. How may I help you?  
**Storm**: Well, blah blah blah blah.  
**Gambit**: Tragic, isn't it? (He leans forward, picking  
up another apple from the cart with his  
foot.) But, no harm done. (Walks over to Rogue.) Now come along sis. Time to see the doctor.  
**Rogue**: (To John Wraith standing nearby) Oh, hello doctor.  
How are you?  
**Gambit**: No, no, no. Not THAT one. (To Storm, whose  
pockets are bulging.) Come on, Professor.  
(Storm bows to the crowd and everything she's stolen from the cart falls out.)  
Juggernaut: Huh? What is it? (Storm picks up what she can  
carry, and the trio run off.) Come back here,  
you little thieves!


	6. Chapter 6

(Cut to int. of Magneto's lab. Pietro is running on a gear in a bizarre  
contraption. (Cerebro's energy source) At the top of the contraption is a storm brewing.)  
**Pietro**: (REALLY BORED) With all due respect, your  
greatness, couldn't we just wait for a real storm?  
**Magneto**: Save your breath, Pietro. Faster! (He places the  
Professor in Cerebro, still hypnotized)  
**Pietro**: Yes, o mighty evil one.  
(Petey runs faster. A lightning bolt streaks through Cerebro, passing  
into the helmet Xavier is wearing.)  
**Magneto**: Ah, Xavier--reveal to me the one who can  
enter the cave. (The images within Cerebro forms the Cave of  
Wonders. It disappears then reappears  
showing Gambit climbing up a ladder, followed by  
Rogue who is covered in her cloak.) Yes, yes!  
There he is. My diamond in the rough!  
**Pietro**: That's him! That's the clown we've been  
waitin' for? (Pietro loses his footing and is sucked  
into the gears.)  
**Magneto**: Let's have the class pet extend him an invitation to  
the mansion, shall we?  
(Pietro goes flying past and slams into the wall, dazed)  
**Pietro**: You're the boss.  
(Magneto laughs hideously, and the camera zooms in on Cerebro image with  
Gambit in it. Finally, we dissolve into the real Gambit climbing  
to the top of the ladder, followed by Rogue.)  
**Gambit**: Almost there.  
(Rogue climbs over the top, but trips and falls into Gambit's arms.  
She stands up.)  
**Rogue**: I want to thank you for stopping that man.  
**Gambit**: Uh, forget it. (He grabs a _**BO-STAFF**_.) So, uh, this is  
your first time in the city, huh?  
(Gambit _**BO-STAFF**_ vaults to the next building, leaving Rogue behind.)  
**Rogue**: Is it that obvious?  
**Gambit**: Well, you do kinda stand out. (He stares at her,  
still in love. She returns the look. But he  
realizes what he is doing, and returns to normal.)  
I mean, uh, you don't seem to know how dangerous  
the city can be. (He lays a plank between the  
buildings for her to walk over, but as he is leaned  
down, she **_BO-STAFF_** vaults over his head. He looks back in  
surprise. She tosses the _**BO-STAFF**_ to him. Both  
Gambit's and Storm's eyes bulge.)  
**Rogue**: I'm a fast learner.  
**Gambit**: Right. C'mon, this way. (They go inside the roof  
of a building, dodging planks and beams as they  
go.) Whoa. Watch your head there. Be careful.  
**Rogue**: Is this where you live?  
**Gambit**: Yep. Just me and Storm. Come and go as we please.  
**Rogue**: Fabulous.  
**Gambit**: Well, it's not much, (he pulls back the curtain and  
exposes the mansion) but it's got a great view.  
Mansion looks pretty amazing, huh?  
**Rogue**: Oh, it's wonderful.  
**Gambit**: I wonder what it would be like to live there, to  
have classes and train...  
**Rogue**: Oh, sure. People who tell you where to go and how  
to dress.  
**Gambit**: It's better than here. Always scraping for food  
and ducking the brown nosers.  
**Rogue**: You're not free to make your own choices.  
**Gambit**: Sometimes you feel so--  
**Rogue**: You're just--  
**Both**: (in unison) --trapped.  
(They look at each other, realizing that they're perfect for one  
another. But Gambit then realizes where he is, and breaks the  
look. He takes the apple out of Storm's hand and rolls it down his  
arm into the hand of Rogue.)  
**Gambit**: So, where're you from?  
**Rogue**: What does it matter? I ran away, and I am not  
going back.  
**Gambit**: Really? (He takes a bite from the apple in his  
hand, then hands it to Storm, who has a disgusted  
look on his face.)  
**Storm**: Why you!  
(Gambit walks over and sits next to Rogue.)  
**Rogue**: My father's forcing me to get married.  
**Gambit**: That's--that's awful. (Storm appears from behind Rogue and tries to steal the apple.) Storm!  
(Storm races up to a higher point, chattering and cursing as she goes.)  
**Rogue**: What?  
**Gambit**: Storm says that--uh--that's not fair.  
**Storm**: What?  
**Rogue**: Oh did she?  
**Gambit**: Yeah, of course.  
**Rogue**: And does Storm have anything else to say?  
**Gambit**: Well, uh, she wishes there was something she could do  
to help.  
**Storm**: Oh, boy!  
**Rogue**: Hmm, tell her that's very sweet.  
(Gambit and Rogue have been getting closer and closer, until  
Gambit leans in to kiss her. He is interrupted, however,  
by the brown noser squad, who have found them.)  
**Scott**: Here you are!  
**Gambit** **and** **Rogue**: They've found me! (To each other) They're  
after you?  
**Rogue**: The Professor must have sent them--  
**Gambit**: Do you trust me?  
**Rogue**: What?  
**Gambit**: Do you trust me? (He extends his hand)  
**Rogue**: Yes. (She takes it.)  
**Gambit**: Then jump!  
(They both jump off the roof, fall and land in a pile of salt. They  
try to get away, but the exit is blocked by Scott.)  
**Scott**: We just keep running into each other, don't we,  
swamp rat?  
(Again, Scott's glasses are pulled off by Storm, but more x-people are  
here and block the exit. Scott pulls Storm off his head and  
throws her in a vase. Three other X-people grab Gambit.)  
**Scott**: It's detention for you, boy.  
**Gambit**: Hey, get off of me!  
**Rogue**: Let go of him.  
**Scott**: (Not realizing she is Rogue) Look what we  
have here, men--a river rat. (He throws her  
down.)  
**Rogue**: (standing up and pulling off the hood of her cloak)  
Unhand him, by order of the princess.  
(The x-people suddenly stop and bow, forcing Gambit to bow as well.)  
**Scott**: Princess Rogue.  
**Gambit**: The princess?  
**Storm**: (peeking out from the vase) The princess?  
**Scott**: What are you doing outside the palace? And with  
this swamp rat?  
**Rogue**: That's not your concern. Do as I command. Release  
him!  
**Scott**: Well, I would, princess, but my orders come from  
Magneto. You'll have to take it up with him.  
(The brown noser squad drag Gambit out, bowing as they go.)  
**Rogue**: (getting a very pissed-off look) Believe me, I  
will.


	7. Chapter 7

(Cut to int. of palace, Magneto emerging from his secret chambers. He  
slides the door shut carefully, but the princess comes storming  
in before he is finished. He slams it shut, pinning Pietro's leg inside  
the door frame.)  
**Rogue**: Erik?  
**Magneto**: Oh, uh, princess.  
**Pietro**: Awk! Father, I'm stuck!  
**Magneto**: How may I be of service to you? (He spreads out his  
cape, hiding the door.)  
**Rogue**: The brown noser squad just took a boy from the city, on your  
orders.  
**Magneto**: Xavier's charged me with keeping peace in  
the city. The boy was a criminal.  
**Rogue**: What was the crime?  
**Pietro**: I can't move, Father!  
**Magneto**: Why, kidnapping the princess, of course.  
**Pietro**: If you could just--(Magneto opens the door a little with powers, then kicks him back inside the door and it slams shut)--wow, that hurt!  
**Rogue**: He didn't kidnap me! I ran away!  
**Magneto**: (Walking away as if shocked) Oh, dear! Oh, why  
frightfully upsetting. Had I but known.  
**Rogue**: What do you mean?  
**Magneto**: Sadly, the boy's sentence has already been carried  
out.  
**Rogue**: What sentence?  
**Magneto**: (with a sinister tone) Death. ( Rogue gasps.)  
By hypothermia in the Arctic.  
**Rogue**: No! (She collapses to the floor.)  
**Magneto**: I am exceedingly sorry, princess.  
**Rogue**: How could you? (She runs from the room crying.)

(Pietro finally makes it out through the door. He runs up and puts a hand on  
Magneto's shoulder, coughing.)  
**Pietro**: So, how did it go?  
**Magneto**: I think she took it rather well. (They both get a  
sinister smile on their faces.)

(Diss. to Rogue at night, crying at the edge of the fountain. Jean

comes over to comfort her.)

**Rogue**: It's all my fault, Jean. I didn't even know his

name.

**Jean**: It's okay Rogue. You didn't mean to do it. (Hugs her)

(Cut to int. of dungeon. Rats scurry by, and we descend until we see

Gambit chained to the wall.)

**Gambit**: (to himself) She was Rogue. I don't believe

it. I must have sounded so stupid to her…(muttering)I didn't know she was Southern though…

**Storm**: (from a distance) Gambit? Hello!

(Storm appears at the window at the top of the dungeon.)

**Gambit**: Stormy! Down here! Hey, c'mon--help me outta these.

(Storm floats down, stops, then wraps a cloth around her head and makes his eyes big in an

imitation of Rogue.)

**Storm**: By the Goddess Gambit!

**Gambit**: Hey, she was in trouble. Ah, she was worth it.

(Storm pulls a small set of tools

out of her pocket, then frees Gambit.)

**Storm**: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

**Gambit**: Don't worry, Storm. I'll never see her again. I'm a

swamp rat, remember, and there's a law. She's

gotta marry a prince, she deserves it.

(Storm finally frees Gambit's hands.)

**Storm**: Ta da! Now Gambit you've got to stop chasing every skirt you see! By the Goddess!

**Gambit**: (Rubbing his wrists) I'm a--I'm a fool

**Old** **Man**: You're only a fool if you give up, boy.

(We see an OLD MAN sitting in the corner that neither Gambit nor Storm

have seen before.)

**Gambit**: Who are you?

**Old** **Man**: A lowly prisoner, like yourself. But together,

perhaps we can be more.

**Gambit**: I'm listening.

**Old** **Man**: There is a cave, boy. A cave of wonders. Filled

with treasures beyond your wildest dreams.

Treasure enough to impress even Rogue, I'd

wager.

(The OLD MAN turns his back, and Pietro sticks

his head around the corner.)

**Pietro**: Magneto, can ya hurry it up? I'm getting older by the second!

**Gambit**: But the law says that only a prince can marry—wait, when have I paid attention to the law?

**Old** **Man**: You've heard of the golden rule, haven't you boy?

Whoever has the gold makes the rules.(He grins,

showing a hideously bad mouth.)

**Gambit**: So why would you share all of this wonderful

treasure with me?

**Old** **Man**: I need a young man with strong legs and a strong

back to go in after it.

**Gambit**: Ah, one problem. It's out there, we're in here?

(The OLD MAN walks to a wall and pushes open a hidden exit.)

**Old** **Man**: Mmm, mmm, mmm., Things aren't always what they

seem. So, do we have a deal?

(Gambit looks at Storm, who shrugs her shoulders.)

**Storm**: Oh, hmm. By the Goddess! We'll do it!


	8. Chapter 8

(Cut to desert scene. We see Gambit driving a car with the

OLD MAN and Storm in it. Diss. to cave of wonders.)

**Cave**: Who disturbs my slumber?

**Gambit**: It is I, Gambit.

**Cave**: Proceed. Touch nothing but the lighter.

(The cave opens up with a roar, and a staircase appears in front of

Gambit. )

**Old** **Man**: Remember, boy--first fetch me the lighter, and then

you shall have your reward.

**Gambit**: C'mon, Stormy. (a shot of Storm hiding behind his trench coat)

(Gambit begins to descend the staircase. He reaches the bottom

and enters a golden chamber filled with treasure.)

**Gambit**: Would ya look at that!

**Storm**: By the Goddess!

**Gambit**: Just a handful of this stuff would make me richer

than the Professor! (Just where does Xavier get his money from anyway?)

(Storm peeks out, sees the treasure, then flies toward it.)

**Gambit**: Storm!

(Storm stops, hovering over a Harley Davidson motorcycle.)

**Gambit**: Don't...touch...anything! We gotta find that lighter.

(They begin to make their way through the room when the Harley starts and begins following them. Storm gets the feeling

they're being followed.)

**Storm**: Huh?

(She turns, and the Harley stops. She continues, and

the Harley begins to follow again. Again, Storm turns back, but the

Harley is leaning against a pile of treasure. Storm

runs to Gambit and tugs his Trench coat.)

**Storm**: By the Goddess! Gambit! Gambit!

**Gambit**: Storm, will ya knock it off?

(Again the Harley follows, but this time, when Storm turns, the Harley rolls to the other side. It rams into Storm lightly. When Storm floats around, the Harley again goes to the other

side. This time, Storm lands in a karate stance. The Harley tugs Storms un-perfect cape off, then puts it on himself. Storm sits

thinking for a second, until the Harley pus a handle in front of her

face. Storm and Harley both jump scared, and run away. Storm tackles

Gambit and turns his head to look at the Harley.)

**Gambit**: Storm, what are you--crazy?

(The Harley peeks out from behind a pile of treasure.)

**Gambit**: A magic motorcycle! A magical Harley Davidson Motorcycle! C'mon. C'mon out. I'm not gonna hurt you.

(The Harley slowly comes out, shyly, then picks up Storm's cape and dusts

it off. It drives next to Gambit and hands the hat to Storm next to

him. Storm freaks out and grabs Gambit's trench coat.)

**Storm**: By the Goddess!

**Gambit**: Take it easy, petite. He's not gonna bite.

(The Harley again picks up Storm's cape and hands it to her. Storm shakes her fist at it. Harley begins to drive away, "sadly.")

**Gambit**: Hey, wait a minute. Don't go. Maybe you can help us. (Harley looks back, excited. It then drives up and somehow Gambit and Storm are sitting on it.) Mon Dieu! …You

see, we're trying to find this lighter… (The Harley begins to drive off.) (in a stage whisper to Storm) I think he knows where it is. (Storm rolls her eyes)

(They pass through a long cave, until they emerge in a giant

underground cavern. In the centre of the room is a tall pillar,

with a staircase going up to it. It is surrounded by water

with unevenly placed stones forming a bridge. At the top of

the pillar is a beam of light. Gambit begins to cross the bridge.)

**Gambit**: Wait here petite!

**Storm**: Oh. Huh?

(Storm sees a shrine with a golden Goddess. The outstretched hands hold a really rare plant. Storm is hypnotically drawn to it. Gambit climbs the

stairs quickly. Harley sees Storm and grabs her cape trying in vain

to hold her back. Gambit finally reaches the MAGIC LIGHTER.)

**Gambit**: This is it? This is what we came all the way down

here to-- (He looks down and sees Storm break free

of Harley's hold and lunge toward the plant.) Stormy-

NO!

(Storm grabs the plant. There is a rumbling and the room begins to

shake.)

**CAVE** **VOICE**: Infidels!

**Storm**: Uh oh!

**Cave** **Voice**: You have touched the forbidden treasure. (Storm places the plant back into the hands, but the plant and the shrine melt into lava.) Now you

will never again see the light of day!

(Gambit races down the steps, but they flatten into a ramp, and he

skies down until he flies into the air. The road is turning into

lava. He is falling toward it, when all of a sudden Harley appears

and catches him. Storm is standing on one of the rocks of the

bridge. She looks left and right and sees rocks exploding into lava.

Then Harley races over and Gambit grabs her, just as the last rock

is exploding.)

**Gambit**: MERDE! Harley, let's move!

(Together, they race back through the caves dodging walls and falling

debris. Storm grabs Gambit's head and covers his eyes.)

**Gambit**: Stormy, this is no time to panic! (He pulls ABU off

his head and sees they are flying into a wall.)

Start panicking.

(Harley goes into a crevice, then through another cave. Finally, they

emerge through the internal entrance. Outside, the cave begins to

growl and close. Harley and company are almost to the top when Harley runs out of gas. Gambit grabs onto the rock wall and holds on. He sees the OLD MAN at the top,

within reach.)

**Gambit**: Help me out!

**Old** **Man**: Throw me the Lighter!

**Gambit**: I can't hold on. Give me your hand.

**Old** **Man**: First give me the lighter!

(Gambit reaches in his **TRENCH COAT** and pulls out the MAGIC LIGHTER. He hands it up, and the OLD MAN raises it above his head.)

**Old** **Man**: Mwa ha ha ha! Yes! At last! Ha ha ha ha!

(Gambit has climbed out with the assistance of Storm. But the OLD

MAN kicks aside Storm and grabs Gambit's wrist.)

**Gambit**: What are you doing?

**Old** **Man**: Giving you your reward. (Magneto returns to his

normal voice.) Your eternal reward.

(He uses his powers to lift up Gambit, when

Storm makes a bolt of lightning hit him on the wrist. He screams, but lets go of Gambit,

who falls into the cave. Magneto throws Storm into the cave using his powers as

well. They fall. Harley sees this, but is out of gas. It struggles to start up, then does. It races

up and catches Gambit, but he has already hit the wall several

times, and is unconscious. On the surface, the cave roars one

final time, then sinks back into the sand. Magneto pulls off

his disguise revealing his **PERFECT CAPE**.)

**Magneto**: Heh heh heh! It's mine. It's all mine! I (He can't

find it in his pocket)--- where is it? No. NO!

(Kiss fade to Rogue's bedroom. She is sitting on her bed, next

to Jean who looks sad. The Professor wheels in.)

**Xavier**: Rogue? Oh, dear. What's wrong?

**Rogue**: Magneto...has...done something... terrible. (She

looks as if she's been crying.)

**Professor**: There, there, there, my child--we'll set it right.

Now, tell me everything.


	9. Chapter 9

(Cut to int. of cave. Gambit lies unconscious on the Harley.

Storm uses her powers to make some rain to wake him.)

**Storm**: Oh, oh. By the Goddess! Gambit? Wake up. Gambit.

(Harley moves a bit, lifting Gambit up. He awakes slowly.)

**Gambit**: Oh, my head. (He looks at the entrance sealed in.)

Mon Dieu! We're trapped. Merde! (Angry, shaking his fists at the entrance) That two faced son-of-a-gator! (Calmer) Whoever he was, he's long gone with that lighter.

**Storm**: Aha!

(Storm pulls out the MAGIC LIGHTER.)

**Gambit**: Why, you little pickpocket! You have the makings of a thief! …Looks like such a

beat-up, worthless piece of junk. Oh well, it'll come in handy. I really need a cigarette…

(He flicks the Lighter. Suddenly smoke comes out of the hole, the

lighter begins to shake and glow, but Gambit holds onto the

Lighter, and our wonderful friend, WOLVERINE comes out. YAY!)

**Wolverine** (as a giant glowing genie): Aaaaahhhhh! ERRRAHH! Over a hundred and fifty years will give ya such a flamin' crick in the neck! (He hangs Gambit on a  
nearby rock. Then he cracks his neck from side to side, groaning as he does so. Harley pulls a  
Gambit down, as Wolverine makes a beer appear and downs it) Damn! Does it feel good to be  
outta there! ( Wolverine uses the lighter end of himself as a microphone.) Good to be back, everyone. Hey, where yah from? (Sticks the mic in Gambit's face.) What's your name?  
**Gambit**: Uh, Ga--uh--Gambit.  
**Wolverine**: (Says his name as if he's discovered something  
major) Gambit! (A neon sign lights up that looks oddly like a bar sign with  
Gambit's name on it, circled by chase lights. The  
sign changes to reflect the Wolverine's upcoming line.)  
Hello, Gambit. Nice ta have yah on the show. Can  
we call you 'Gumbo?' Or maybe just 'Cajun?' Or how  
bout 'Swamp thing?' (Wolverine disappears, then the creature from the black lagoon appears.) Sounds like 'OH GOD! It's the Swamp thing!'  
**Gambit**: (Shaking his head) I must have hit my head harder  
than I thought.  
**Wolverine**: (Still a swamp thing) Do yah smoke? Mind if I do? (Swamp thing  
poofs into smoke, then back to the Wolverine who is smoking a cigar. Storm  
hides under Gambit's trench coat.) Oh, sorry Cheetah--hope I  
didn't singe the cape! Hey, Harley! Haven't seen  
you in a few decades! Slap me some wheel! (Harley drives over and high fives Wolverine.  
Wolverine looks at Gambit.) Say, you're a lot smaller  
than my last master. (Lifts his beer-gut.) Either  
that or I'm gettin' bigger. Look at me from the  
side--do I look different to you?  
**Gambit**: Wait a minute! I'm--your master?  
**Wolverine**: (Slaps a beer in Gambit's hand and a  
sombrero on his head.) That's right! Congratulations, genius! What would yah wish of me, (as Colossus) the ever impressive,(inside a cube as Scarlet Witch) the long contained, (as a ventriloquist with a Cyclops dummy) often imitated, (tosses the Cyclops dummy aside) but never duplicated--  
(He multiplies into multiple Wolverines who surround him, and don't look at ALL like each other. Being from different stories, timelines, movies, cartoons, etc.)  
**DUP**. **Wolverines**: Duplicated, duplicated, duplicated,  
duplicated, duplicated, duplicated,  
duplicated, duplicated, duplicated.  
**Wolverine**: (Says it like a ring announcer at a cage match.)  
Wolverine! Of! The Lighter! (Goes into Jubilee) Right here direct from the lighter, right  
here for your enjoyment wish fulfillment.  
Thank youuuuu!  
**Gambit**: Whoa! Wish fulfillment?  
**Wolverine**: Three wishes to be exact. And ix-nay on the  
wishing for more flamin' wishes. (Turns into a slot  
machine, arm pulls down and three claws appear in  
the windows.) That's it--three. (Three Wolverine  
psycho fans come out of the slot.) Uno, dos, tres.  
(Changes into Psylock.) No  
substitutions, exchanges or refunds. (Then Lockheed  
drops with the secret word "Refunds.")  
**Gambit**: (To Storm) Now I know I'm dreaming.  
**Wolverine**: (Music for "Friend Like Me" begins) Master, I don't  
think yah realize what yah've got here! So  
why don't you just ruminate, whilst I illuminate  
the possibilities. (Wolverine lights up like a  
fluorescent light)  
Well that southern gang had them forty thieves  
Professor Xavier had a thousand tales  
But master you in luck 'cause up your sleeve  
You got a brand of magic never fails!

(Wolverine produces 40 thieves who surround Gambit with guns.  
Wolverine appears in his trench coat, then sticks his arms out and boxes  
the thieves into submission.)

You got some power in your corner now  
Some heavy adimantium as a fighter

You got some punch, pizzazz, yahoo and how  
See all you gotta do is flick that lighter  
And I'll say

(Boxing ring appears, Gambit in the corner, being massaged  
by Wolverine. Then Wolverine pops his claws and rubs them together. Then Wolverine appears inside lighter and grabs Gambit's  
thumb and flicks the lighter with it.)

Mister Gambit sir  
What will your pleasure be?  
Let me take yer order, jot it down  
You ain't never had a friend like me  
No no no!

(Wolverine produces a table and chairs for a diner, then writes down things on a  
note pad, like a waiter. )

Life is your restaurant  
And I'm your maitre' d!  
C'mon whisper what it is you want  
You ain't never had a friend like me.

(Wolverine appears as a bowl of gumbo, then returns to normal,  
but enlarges his ear to listen to Gambit. Finally, he explodes  
into four duplicate Wolverines.)

Yes sir, we pride ourselves on service  
You're the boss, the king, the shah!  
Say what you wish, it's yours! True dish  
How about a little more Baklava?

(The Wolverine's give him a shave, haircut and manicure, then Gambit appears in a comfy chair (eh?) surrounded by the treasure  
and being fanned by southern belles. The Wolverine appears and fills the  
screen with baklava.)

Try some of column 'A'  
Try all of column 'B'  
I've got a rub to help yah bub   
You ain't never had a friend like me

(Gambit rises up on a column of food with a giant A on top,  
then jumps to another column with a B on top. He falls off  
and is caught by a cushion held by Wolverine. He opens his mouth,  
and his tongue turns into a staircase. A miniature Wolverine  
dressed like a samurai comes out.)

(The mini Wolverine does a little swordfight with Wolverine's two giant  
hands. At the end, they surround the mini Wolverine and squish  
him into nothing.)

Can your friends do this?  
Do your friends do that?  
Do your friends pull this out their little hat  
Can your friends go poof!  
Well looky here  
Can your friends go Abracadabra, let 'er rip  
And then make the sucker disappear?

(The Wolverine pulls off his head, duplicates it, then juggles them.  
He tosses them to Gambit, who juggles with one hand and spins  
one of the heads on his fingertip like a basketball. He tosses  
the heads back onto the Wolverine, who proceeds to try and pull  
himself out of a hat at his base. He spirals around and around  
until he turns into a white queen. Emma transforms into  
a Pyro. Then Pyro bursts fire, which turns into three Southern Harem Girls,  
who dance around Gambit. Just as he begins to enjoy them,  
they disappear.)

So don't you sit there slack jawed, buggy eyed  
I'm here to answer all your midday prayers  
You got me bona fide, certified  
You got a genie for a charg? d'affairs!  
I got a powerful urge to help you out  
So what you wish I really want to know  
You got a wish that's three miles long, no doubt  
So all you gotta do is flick like so, and oh!  
(Wolverine imitates what he is calling Gambit, then turns into a  
certificate which rolls up and surrounds Gambit. Wolverine pulls  
a list written in French out of Gambit's ear, which he uses  
to rub his behind like drying off after a shower.)

Mister Gambit, sir, have a wish or two or three  
I'm on the job, you big nabob  
You ain't never had a friend, never had a friend  
You ain't never had a friend, never had a friend  
You ain't never...had a... friend... like...me!  
You ain't never had a friend like me!

(The dancing SOUTHERN HAREM GIRLS reappear, and Gambit leans in to kiss one.  
She turns into Wolverine, who zaps four dancing flamingos into  
existence. To the other direction, he zaps in four dancing alligators,  
and a grand finale dancing number ensues. Storm grabs as much gold  
as he can, but the Wolverine wraps everything up in a cyclone and  
zaps it away until they're all back in the cave. Wolverine has a  
neon "APPLAUSE OR ELSE" sign on his back. Storm turns her cape over and  
sees that is empty.)

**Wolverine**: So what'll it be, Master?  
**Gambit**: You're gonna grant me any three wishes I want?  
**Wolverine**: (As Beast) Ah, almost. There are a  
few provisos, a couple of quid pro quos  
**Gambit**: Like?  
**Wolverine**: Rule number one: I can't kill anybody. (He  
slices his head off with a claw and Gambit looks at him skeptically.) I CAN'T...so don't  
ask. Rule two: I can't make anyone fall in love  
with anyone else. ( Rips a love note with the name Jean written on it, in half) You little punim, there. (Lies flat, then gets up and transforms into a  
zombie.) Rule three: I can't bring people back from  
the dead. It ain't a pretty picture, (He grabs  
Gambit and shakes him) I don't like doin' it. (He  
poofs back to normal.) Other than that, you got  
it!  
**Gambit**: (Looks at Storm as if plotting) Ah, provisos? You  
mean limitations? On wishes? (To Storm) Some all  
powerful genie--can't even bring people back from  
the dead. I don't know, Stormy--he probably can't even  
get us out of this cave. Looks like we're gonna  
have to find a way out of here--  
(They start to leave, but a big blue cowboy boot stomps down in front of  
them.)  
**Wolverine**: Where do you think you're goin'? Are you lookin' at  
me? Did you flick my lighter? Did you wake me up, did  
you bring me here? And all of a sudden, you're  
walkin' out on me? (Gets madder and madder, berserker rage setting in) I  
don't think so, not right now. You're gettin' your  
wishes, so siddown! (They all get on Harley.  
Wolverine, drivers seat, takes the form of a steward, with lots of  
arms pointing out the exits.) In case of  
emergency, the exits are here, here, here,  
here,here, here, here, here, here, here, here,  
here, anywhere! Keep your hands and arms inside  
the carpet. Weeee'rrrrrreee...outta here!  
(The Harley Davidson and passengers break out of the sand in the desert at frightening speed and off  
into the distance. )


	10. Chapter 10

(Cut to int. of Professor's chamber. Magneto is  
there with Pietro, Rogue and the Professor.)  
**Professor**: Erik, this is an outrage. If it weren't for all  
your years of loyal service... . From now on,  
you are to discuss sentencing of prisoners with me,  
before they are sent to the Arctic!  
**Magneto**: I assure you, your highness, it won't happen again.  
**Professor**: (oblivious the Rogue still hates Magnus) Rogue, Erik, now let's put this whole messy  
business behind us. Please?  
**Magneto**: My most abject and humblest apologies to you as  
well, Rogue. (He takes her hand to kiss it, but  
she yanks it away.)  
**Rogue**: At least some good will come of my being forced to  
marry. When I am headmaster, I will have the  
power to get rid of you.  
**Professor**: That's nice. All settled, then. Now, Rogue,  
getting back to this suitor business, (he  
looks and sees Rogue walking out) Rogue?  
Rogue! (He wheels after her.)  
**Magneto**: If only I had gotten that lighter!  
**Pietro**: (As Rogue) I will have the power to get rid of  
you! D'oh! To think--we gotta keep kissing  
up to that chump, and his chump daughter for the  
rest of our lives...  
**Magneto**: No, my son. Only until she finds a chump husband.  
Then she'll have us banished--or sent to the Arctic!  
**Both**: Brrrrrr!  
**Pietro**: She seems to like doing that...(Has an idea) Oh! Wait a minute! Wait a minute!  
Father? What if you were the chump husband?  
**Magneto**: (He looks at Pietro in insult) What?  
**Pietro**: Okay, you marry the princess, all right? Then, uh,  
you become headmaster!  
**Magneto**: Oh! Marry the river rat? I become headmaster. The idea has  
merit!  
**Pietro**: Yes, merit! Yes! And then we drop the Professor and  
the little woman off a cliff! (runs up a wall then stops suddenly to let gravity slam him into the floor) Kersplat!  
**Magneto**: Pietro, I love the way your foul little mind works!

(Both laugh)

(we cut to an oasis in the desert, where Harley is

driving.)

**Wolverine**: (Still as steward) Thank you for choosing Magic

Harley for all yer travel needs. Don't flamin' stand

until the bike has come to a complete stop. (As

Gambit and Storm get off the bike.) Thank you. Good bye, good bye! Thank you!

Good bye! (Back to normal) Well, now. How about

that, Mr. doubting mustafa?

**Gambit**: Oh, you sure showed me. Now about my three wishes-

**Wolverine**: Does my heightened hearing deceive me? Three? You are down by

ONE, boy!

**Gambit**: Ah, no--I never actually wished to get out of the

cave. You did that on your own. #Oh the cleverness of me!#

(Wolverine thinks for a second, then his jaw drops. Begins to go feral, claws snikt out, then he calms down and claws snakt back in.)

**Wolverine**: Fine Punk, but no more freebies.

**Gambit**: Fair deal. So, three wishes. I want them to be

good. (To Wolverine) What would you wish for?

(Wolverine is hanging like a hammock between two trees, smoking a cigar.)

**Wolverine**: Me? No one's ever asked me that before. Well, in

my case, ah, forget it.

**Gambit**: What? No, tell me.

**Wolverine**: Freedom.

**Gambit**: You're a prisoner?

**Wolverine**: It's all part-and-parcel, the whole genie gig.

(Grows gigantic, voice echoes) Phenomenal cosmic

powers! (Shrinks down, cramped in MAGIC LIGHTER.)

Itty bitty living space. Weapon X always after you…

**Gambit**: Wolverine, that's terrible.

**Wolverine**: (Comes out of the Lighter) But, oh--to be free. Not

have to go "Poof! What do you need bub? Poof! What do

you need bub? Poof! What do you need bub?" To be my own

master, such a thing would be greater than all the

magic and all the treasures in all the world! I might even get a girlfriend that won't die! But

what am I talking about, here? Let's get real

here. It's not gonna happen. Wolverine, wake up and

smell the hummus

**Gambit**: Why not?

**Wolverine**: The only way I get outta this is if my master

wishes me out. So you can guess how often that's

happened. And Sabertooth kills all of my girlfriends or lovers.

**Gambit**: I'll do it. I'll set you free.

**Wolverine**: (Head turns into Pinocchio's with a long nose) Uh

huh, right. Whoop!

**Gambit**: No, really, I promise. (He pushes the nose back in

and Wolverine's head returns to normal.) After make my

first two wishes, I'll use my third wish to set you

free. (He holds out his hand)

**Wolverine**: Well, here's hopin' bub. (Shakes Gambit's hand.)

O.K. Let's make some magic! (Turns into a

magician.) So how 'bout it. What is it you want

most?

**Gambit**: Well, there's this girl--

**Wolverine**: Eehhh! (Like a buzzer, and Wolverine's chest shows a

heart with a cross through it.) Wrong! I can't

make anybody fall in love, remember?

**Gambit**: Oh, but Wolverine. She's smart and fun and...

**Wolverine**: Pretty?

**Gambit**: Beautiful. She's got these eyes that just...and

this hair, wow...and her smile.

**Wolverine**: (Sitting in a Parisian cafe with Storm and Harley.)

Ami. C'est l'amour.

**Gambit**: But she's the princess. To even have a chance, I'd

have to be a--hey, can you make me a prince?

**Wolverine**: Let's see here. (Has a "Royal Cookbook".) Uh,

chicken a'la king? (Pulls out a chicken with a

crown on its head) Nope. Alaskan king crab?

(Yanks out his finger, and we see SEBASTIAN the crab from

"The Little Mermaid" clamped on.) Ow, I

hate it when they do that. Caesar's salad? (A

dagger comes out and tries to stab him.) Et tu,

Brute? Ah, to make a prince. (Looks slyly at

Gambit.) Now is that an official wish? Say the

words!

**Gambit**: Wolverine, I wish for you to make me a prince!

**Wolverine**: All right! (Takes on square

shoulders and looks like Arsenio Hall. Then becomes

a tailor/fashion designer.) First, that trench coat and

metal boot combo is much too third century. This

**BO-STAFF**--what are we trying to say--thief? No!

Let's work with me here. (He takes Gambit's

measurements, snaps his fingers and Gambit is

outfitted in his prince costume.) I like it, muy

macho! Now, still needs something. What does it

say to me? It says mode of transportation. Excuse

me, goddess girl! Aqui, over here! (Storm tries to

hide behind Harley, but Wolverine zaps her and

she flies over.)

**Storm**: By the Goddess!

**Wolverine**: Here he comes, (Gambit and Wolverine are on a game

show set, where Gambit stands behind a podium with

"Gumbo" on it.) And what better way to make your

grand entrance on the streets of New York, than

in your very own brand new Millennium Falcon! Watch out,

bounty hunters track it! (A door bearing Wolverine's head on it

opens, where Storm is transformed into the Millennium Falcon. Boba Fett appears on cue. But Wolverine's not sure.) Mmm, not enough. (He snaps his

fingers and Storm turns into a fancy Lamborghini.)

Still not enough. Let's see. What do you need?

(Wolverine snaps his fingers repeatedly, turning

Storm into: the Blackbird, an ostrich, a turtle, and a '57

Cadillac, with license plate "STORMY 1." Finally, she's returned to

normal.) Yes! Esalalumbo, shimin dumbo! Whoa!

(And on the keyword of the spell, Dumbo, Storm turns

into an elephant.) Talk about your trunk

space, check this action out!

(Storm sees her reflection in a pool of water, then jumps into a tree.

The tree naturally bends right back down to the ground, where Storm

hangs on and looks at Gambit upside down.)

**Gambit**: Stormy, you look good.

**Wolverine**: He's got the outfit, he's got the elephant, but

we're not through yet. Hang on to your trench coat,

bub, cause we're gonna make you a star!

(We zoom out slowly with the oasis in the distance, as fireworks

begin to explode outward.)


	11. Chapter 11

(Cut to a CU of a pile of toys. We tilt up and see the Professor

balancing them telepathically He carefully balances the last piece on top,

then sits back and sighs. Magneto storms in, though, and the

pile collapses.)

**Magneto**: Professor, I have found a solution to the problem with

Rogue.

**Pietro**: Yeah! The problem with Rogue!

**Professor**: Oh, really?

**Magneto**: (using powers to open a book and make it hover in front of the Professor) Right here. "If the princess has not chosen a husband by the appointed time,

then the headmaster shall choose for her."

**Xavier**: But Rogue hated all those suitors! (He tries to

stuff a blow pop into Pietro's mouth. Pietro backs

away. The Professor absentmindedly pulls the Blow pop

back.) How could I choose someone she hates?

(Pietro is relieved, but the Professor quickly stuffs a

Blow pop in his mouth.)

**Magneto**: Not to worry, Charles. There is more. If, in the

event a suitable prince cannot be found, a princess

must then be wed to...hmm...interesting.

**Xavier**: What? Who?

**Magneto**: The assistant headmaster! Why, that would be...me!

**Xavier**: Why, I thought the law says that only a prince can

marry a princess, I'm quite sure.

**Magneto**: Desperate times call for desperate measures, Charles. (He pulls out the hypnotizer thing and hypnotizes the

Professor with it.)

**Xavier**: Yes...desperate measures...

**Magneto**: You will order Rogue to marry me.

**Xavier**: I...will order...Rogue...to...(the spell

breaks momentarily)...but you're so old!

**Magneto**: (Holds the staff closer) Rogue will marry

me!

**Xavier**: Rogue will marry...(the spell is again

broken, this time by the trumpet fanfare of "Prince

Ali"…I mean… "Wolverine".) What? What is that? That music! Ha ha ha.

Erik., you must come and see this!

**Allison**: Make way for Wolverine  
Say hey! It's Wolverine

Hey! Clear the way in the old Bazaar  
Hey you!  
Let us through!  
It's an awesome old star!  
Oh Come!  
Be the first on your block to meet his eye!

Make way!  
Here he comes!  
Ring bells! Bang the drums!  
Are you gonna love this guy!

Wolverine! Fabulous he!  
The Feral Canadian  
Genuflect, show some respect  
Down on one knee!  
Now, try your best to stay calm  
He is absolutely the bomb  
Then come and meet his spectacular coterie

Wolverine!  
Mighty is he!  
The Feral Canadian  
Strong as ten regular men, definitely!  
He faced the galloping hordes  
A hundred bad guys with swords  
Who sent those goons to their lords?  
Why, Wolverine

He's got tons of war stories to ramble  
Personality  
He's wild and free  
When it comes to exotic-type mammals  
Has he seen a zoo?  
I'm telling you, it's a world-class menagerie

Wolverine! Handsome is he, The Feral Canadian  
That physique! How can I speak  
Weak at the knee  
Well, get on out in that square  
Adjust your x-suit and prepare  
To gawk and grovel and stare at Wolverine!

There's no question this Wolvie's alluring  
Never ordinary, never boring  
Everything about the man just plain impresses  
He's a winner, he's a whiz, a wonder!  
He's about to pull my heart asunder!  
And I absolutely love the way he dresses!

He's fought and beaten up Victor Creed  
(Kicked his ass, Kicked his ass)  
And to view the fight he charges no fee  
(He's generous, so generous)  
He's got attitude, he's got Fan girls and Fan boys  
(Proud to work for him)  
They bow to his whim love serving him  
They're just lousy with loyalty to Wolverine! Wolverine!

Wolverine!  
Amorous he! Wolverine the Feral Canadian  
Heard he loves drinkin' his beer in that bar down the street  
And that, good people, is why he got a cigar and dropped by  
With his buddy Gambit, women galore  
With his Harley Davidson  
Maybe a bike or two more  
With his wicked hair, his aura, his stare  
He's' the COOLEST can't you see  
Make way for Wolverine!

(More and more fanfare build up until Gambit jumps off storm's back

on Harley and drives down to the Professor, Wolverine right in front of him. Magneto slams the

door shut using his magnetical powers.)

**Professor**: (Clapping) Splendid, absolutely marvelous.

**Gambit**: (To Wolverine) Ummm…wasn't that song supposed to be about me? To help me win Rogue's heart? Who was that?

**Wolverine**: Sorry, she gets out of control sometimes…Allison's the only one I know who can sing… (Talks louder.) Ahem. Hey Chuck, this is Prince…(to Gambit) what should I call you?

**Gambit**: Remy LeBeau…

**Wolverine**: Prince Remy. Remy LeBeau. He wants to marry Stripes. (meaning Rogue…if you haven't guessed)

**Xavier**: Prince Remy LeBeau! Of course. I'm delighted to

meet you. (He rolls over and shakes Gambit's hand.)

This is my assistant headmaster, Erik Lensherr. He's delighted

too.

**Magneto**: (Extremely dryly) Ecstatic. I'm afraid, Prince

LeBooboo--

**Gambit**: --LeBeau!

**Magneto**: Whatever. You cannot just parade in here uninvited

and expect to--

**Xavier**: ...by Cerebro, this is quite a remarkable device.

(He revs the handles of Harley and Harley rams his wheelchair.) I don't suppose I might...

**Gambit**: Why certainly, Professor. Allow me. #How the hell is he supposed to ride it if he's crippled?#

(He helps the Professor up onto the Harley, and he plops down.

Magneto stops the Harley with his powers.)

**Magneto**: Charles, I must advise against this--

**Xavier**: --Oh, button up, Magneto. Learn to have a little fun.

(He makes Magneto let go with his powers, then drives around on Harley. Pietro, who

was leaning on Harley, falls down. Xavier and

Harley drive in a circle, then go really fast toward Storm,

Scaring her. The drive continues in the

background, while Magneto and Gambit talk in the foreground.)

**Magneto**: Just where did you say you were from?

**Gambit**: Oh, much farther than you've traveled, I'm sure.

(He smiles. Magneto does not.)

**Magneto**: Try me. (Pietro leans on Xavier's desk.)

**Xavier**: Look out, Petey!

(They all jump away in time as the Harley whizzes past them. Harley returns and they chases Pietro around the room.)

**Pietro**: Hey, watch it. Watch it with the dumb bike!

**Wolverine**: …Bike…dumb? …grr…

(The Harley zooms near Pietro, who sighs, wipes his brow, and

crashes into a pillar. He crashes to the floor, and his head

is circled by miniature Xaviers on Harleys, saying "Have a Blow Pop,

have a Blow Pop. The real Xavier begins his final approach.)

**Xavier**: Out of the way, I'm coming in to park. Magneto,

watch this! (He parks.)

**Magneto**: Spectacular, Charles.

**Xavier**: Ooh, lovely. Yes, I do seem to have a knack for

it. (Harley rolls over to Storm dizzily, then

collapses. Storm catches it.) This is a very

impressive young man. And a prince as well. (Whispers

to Magneto) If we're lucky, you won't have to marry

Rogue after all.

**Magneto**: I don't trust him, Charles.

**Xavier**: Nonsense. One thing I pride myself on Magneto, I'm

an excellent judge of character.

**Pietro**: Oh, excellent judge, yeah, sure...not!

(Rogue walks in quietly.)

**Xavier**: Rogue will like this one!

**Gambit**: And I'm pretty sure I'll like Princess Rogue!

**Magneto**: Professor, no. I must intercede on Rogue's

behalf. (Rogue hears this and gets mad.) This

boy is no different than the others. What makes

him think he is worthy of the princess?

**Gambit**: Professor, I am Prince Remy LeBeau! (He flicks Magneto's helmet, which falls off. (almost ruining his **perfect cape**.)) Just let her meet me. I will win

Rogue!

**Rogue**: How dare you! (They all look at her surprised.)

All of you, standing around deciding my future? I

am not a prize to be won! (She storms out.)

**Xavier**: Oh, dear. Don't worry, Prince Remy. Just give

Rogue time to cool down. (They exit.)

**Magneto**: I think it's time to say good bye to Prince

LeBooboo.


	12. Chapter 12

(Diss to Rogue on her balcony at night. We tilt down and find

Gambit and company in the courtyard.)

**Gambit**: What am I going to do? Rogue won't even let me

talk to her. I should have known I couldn't pull

off this stupid prince wish. (Storm struggles with

her elephant paws to open a banana. She squishes

it, and the banana squirts into her eye. She then

tosses the banana peel into a heaping pile of the

same.)

**Wolverine**: (to Harley, playing poker) So bet! (Harley does,

Pushing forward $100. Harley sets down four Aces and a king) Hey.

That's a good hand. (As Rodney Dangerfield) I

can't believe it--I'm losing to a motorcycle.

**Gambit**: Wolverine, I need help.

**Wolverine**: (as Jack Nicholson) All right, sparky, here's the

deal. You wanna court the little lady, you gotta

be a straight shooter, do ya follow me?

**Gambit**: What?

**Wolverine**: (Back to normal, wearing a mortarboard. He points

out his words on a blackboard) Tell her

the...TRUTH!

**Gambit**: No way! If Rogue found out I was really some

crummy swamp rat, she'd laugh at me. (He

puts on his trench coat, which lights up as the wolverine.)

**Wolverine**: A woman appreciates a man who can make her laugh!

(Gambit pulls the chain turning off the light.

Wolverine comes out holding the real trench coat.) Remy, all

joking aside, you really oughtta be yourself.

**Gambit**: Hey, that's the last thing I want to be. Okay,

I'm gonna go see her. I'm gonna be smooth, cool,

confident. How do I look?

**Wolverine**: (Sadly) Like a prince.

(Gambit climbs up to the balcony with Harley below. Rogue is on her bed,

sighing. Jean is by her side.)

**Gambit**: (From a distance) Rogue?

(Jean looks up and glares.)

**Rogue**: Who's there?

**Gambit**: It's me--Prince Remy. Ahem--(Then he jumps to his

deep voice) Prince Remy LeBeau.

**Rogue**: I do not want to see you.

**Gambit**: No, no, please chere. Give me a chance. (Jean

Walks over to him ready to use telekinesis.)

**Rogue**: Just leave me alone.

**Gambit**: Hi Jean!

(Over the edge of the balcony, Harley is watching with Wolverine below.)

**Wolverine**: How's LeBeau doing?

(Harley wiggles handlebars back and forth as if shaking his head.)

**Gambit**: Good night isn't it? Don't attack me. (He takes out a card to charge it.)

**Rogue**: (She looks at him thinking she has seen him

before.) Wait, wait. Do I know you?

**Gambit**: (uses sleight of hand to put card back in his trench coat) Uh, no, no.

**Rogue**: You remind me of someone I met in the marketplace.

**Gambit**: The marketplace? (A bee buzzes around his head.)

I have servants that go to the marketplace for me.

Why I even have servants who go to the marketplace

for my servants, so it couldn't have been me you

met.

**Rogue**: (She looks disappointed.) No, I guess not.

**Bee**: (It's Wolverine) Enough about you, Casanova. Talk

about her! She's smart, fun, the hair, the eyes.

Anything--pick a feature!

**Gambit**: Um, Rogue? You're very...

**Bee**: Wonderful, glorious, magnificent, punctual!

**Gambit**: Punctual!

**Rogue**: Punctual?

**Bee**: Sorry.

**Gambit**: Beautiful.

**Bee**: Nice recovery.

**Rogue**: Hmm. I'm rich too, you know.

**Gambit**: Yeah!

**Rogue**: A student of the Professor.

**Gambit**: I know.

**Rogue**: A fine prize for any prince to marry.

**Gambit**: Uh, right. Right. A prince like me.

**Bee**: (Buzzing in his ear) Warning! This ain't gonna be pretty…

**Rogue**: Right, a prince like you. And every other stuffed shirt,

swaggering, peacock I've met!

**Bee**: (Puts hand to face, shaking head) Smooth…come on do something!

**Rogue**: Just go jump off a balcony! (She turns and walks away)

**Gambit**: What?

**Bee**: Stop her! Stop her! Do you want me to snikt her? Don't you want her?

**Gambit**: (Swats at bee) Buzz off!

**Bee**: Okay, fine, if that's how ya want it bug. But remember--be yourself…try tellin' the truth. (BEE buzzes away)

**Gambit**: Yeah, right!

**Rogue**: What!

**Gambit**: Uh, you're right. You aren't just some prize to be

won. (He looks disappointed.) You should be free

to make your own choice. (Jean and Rogue look

at each other in confusion.) I'll go now. (He

steps up on the ledge and drops off.)

**Rogue**: No!

**Gambit**: (Pokes his head up from over the edge) What? What?

**Rogue**: (Now she's amazed) How--how are you doing that?

(She looks over the edge and sees the Harley.)

**Gambit**: It's a magic Harley.

**Rogue**: It's lovely. (Harley revs himself.)

**Gambit**: You, uh, you don't want to go for a ride, do you?

We could get out of the mansion, see the city.

**Rogue**: Is it safe?

**Gambit**: Sure. Do you trust me?

**Rogue**: (She looks at him at the saying of that all-

important line) What?

**Gambit**: (Extends his hand the same as before) Do you trust

me?

**Rogue**: (Gets a sly grin on her face) Yes.

(She takes his hand and gets on Harley. It zooms off,

Making Rogue hug Gambit around the wais tightly, then she realizes what she's doing and loosens her grip. The music of "A Whole

New World" swells. Rogue looks back and sees Jean looking

up at her questioningly. She gasps as they drive through the open mansion gates.)

**Gambit**: I can show you the world

Shining, shimmering, splendid.

Tell me princess, now when did you last

Let your heart decide?

I can open your eyes

Take you wonder by wonder

Over, sideways, and under

On a motorcycle ride

A whole new world!

A new fantastic point of view

No one to tell us no

Or where to go

Or say we're only dreaming

**Rogue**: A whole new world

A dazzling place I never knew

But when I'm way up here

It's crystal clear

That now I'm in a whole new world with you!

**Gambit**: Now I'm in a whole new world with you!

**Rogue**: Unbelievable sights

Indescribable feeling

Soaring, tumbling, freewheeling

Through an endless diamond sky

A whole new world!

**Gambit**: Don't you dare close your eyes

**Rogue**: An hundred thousand things to see

**Gambit**: Hold your breath--it gets better!

**Rogue**: I'm like a shooting star,

I've come so far

I can't go back to where I used to be!

**Gambit**: A whole new world!

**Rogue**: Every turn a surprise

**Gambit**: With new horizons to pursue

**Rogue**: Every moment, red-letter

**Both:** I'll chase them anywhere

There's time to spare

Let me share this whole new world with you

A whole new world

That's where we'll be

(They fly through Greece, where GAMBIT grabs an apple from a

tree and rolls it down his arm to ROGUE, who is now sure

she is dealing with GAMBIT, not PRINCE REMY.)

**Gambit**: A thrilling chase

**Rogue**: A wondrous place

**Both**: For you and me!

**Rogue**: It's all so magical.

**Gambit**: Yeah.

**Rogue**: (She looks at him and decides to burst the bubble)

It's a shame Storm had to miss this.

**Gambit**: Nah. She hates fireworks. (HARLEY looks up

realizing what is happening.) He doesn't really

like flying either. (And now GAMBIT realizes it)

That is...oh no!

**Rogue:** (She pulls off his turban) You are the boy from the

market! I knew it. Why did you lie to me?

**Gambit:** Rogue, I'm sorry.

**Rogue**: Did you think I was stupid?

**Gambit**: No!

**Rogue**: That I wouldn't figure it out?

**Gambit**: No. I mean, I hoped you wouldn't. No, that's not

what I meant.

**Rogue**: Who are you? Tell me the truth!

**Gambit**: The truth? (He looks at HARLEY who wave him on,

giving up hope.) The truth...the truth is...I

sometimes dress as a commoner to escape the

pressures of palace life. (HARLEY slumps down in

defeat.) But I really am a prince!

**Rogue**: Why didn't you just tell me?

**Gambit**: Well, you know, um...royalty going out into the

city in disguise, it sounds a little strange,

don't you think?

**Rogue**: Not that strange.

(She cuddles with him. Dissolve to ext.

of palace balcony, where GAMBIT and ROGUE return. Gambit helps her off and helps her up to the balcony, standing on Harley's seat)

**Rogue**: Good night, my handsome prince.

**Gambit**: Sleep well, chere.

(They slowly lean forward to kiss, but HARLEY bumps him up and they

kiss sooner than expected. She walks away slowly then turns and

looks at him. Finally she enters her room through the curtain.)

**Gambit**: Yes! (He falls back onto the HARLEY, who begins to drive off.) For the first time in my life,

things are starting to go right.

(He looks up at Rogue's balcony, and four sets of hands grab him.)

**Gambit**: Hey! What? (A gag is tied around his mouth.

Muffled words) Stormy! Storm! (We see the elephant

hanging from a net tied in a tree.)

**Scott**: Hold him!

(Shackles are placed on his feet and his hands. Magneto uses powers to tie HARLEY in a knot around a tree.)

**Magneto**: I'm afraid you've worn out your welcome, Prince

LeBooboo. (Walks away.) Make sure he's

never found.

(Scott hits him in the head, and he falls unconscious.)


	13. Chapter 13

(Cut to a cliff, where Brown-nosers laugh as Gambit's body drops into the water.

He is conscious now, but his feet are tied to a rock. The rock

hits the sea bottom, then the lighter falls out of his trench coat. He sees this and struggles to open the lighter. However, he loses consciousness and falls to the floor. The lighter, unsettled

by his movement, falls open in his hands. It shakes,

and WOLVERINE emerges with a Beer.)

**Wolverine**: Never fails. Open a beer and people flick the lighter. Hello. (Sees

unconscious GAMBIT) Remy? Remy! Kid, snap out of it!

You can't cheat on this one! I can't help you

unless you make a wish. You have to say "Wolverine I

want you to save my life." Got it? Okay. C'mon

Gambit! (He grabs GAMBIT by the shoulders and

shakes him. His head goes up, then falls.) I'll

take that as a yes. (Turns into a submarine.) Up

scope! (He babbles in something that sounds like

German. On the surface, a giant water spout

emerges, and lands on top of the cliff. GAMBIT

reawakes and coughs the water out of his lungs.)

Don't you scare me like that!

**Gambit**: Wolverine, I--uh, I-uh...(He can't think of how to say

it, so they just hug each other.) Thanks, Wolverine.

**Wolverine**: Oh, Gambit. I'm gettin' kind of fond of you, kid. Not

that I want to pick out curtains or anything.

(Cut to ROGUE in her room, humming "A Whole New World" and brushing

her hair. The Professor appears in one of the double doors, hypnotized.)

**Professor: **Rogue!

**Rogue**: Oh, Professor--I just had the most wonderful time.

I'm so happy.

**Professor**: (Still monotone from the hypnosis) You should be,

Rogue. I have chosen a husband for you.

**Rogue**: What?

**Professor**: (The other door opens and reveals MAGNETO.) You will

wed Magneto.

(ROGUE gasps at the sight of him.)

**Magneto**: You're speechless, I see. A fine quality in a

wife.

**Rogue**: I will never marry you. (She goes to the PROFESSOR)

Father, I choose Prince Remy!

**Magneto**: Prince Remy left!

(A quick pan finds GAMBIT standing in the doorway to the balcony.)

**Gambit**: Better check Cerebro again, Magneto!

**Rogue**: Prince Remy!

(MAGNETO gasps at the sight of GAMBIT.)

**Pietro**: How in the he—(begins to speak faster and faster until you cant understand him)

**Gambit**: Tell them the truth, Magneto! You tried to have me

killed.

**Magneto**: What? (He goes to the PROFESSOR) Ridiculous

nonsense, Charles. He is obviously lying.

(He brings the hypnotizing thing close to the Professor's face.)

**Professor: **Obviously...lying.

(GAMBIT sees the hypnotizing thing.)

**Rogue**: Professor, what's wrong with you?

**Gambit**: I know!

(GAMBIT grabs the hypnotizing thing and charges it and blows it up. MAGNETO flinches

and the spell is broken for good.)

**Professor**: Oh, oh, oh my!

**Gambit**: Your highness, Magneto's been controlling you with

this! (He advances the hypnotizing thingy)

**Professor**: What? Magneto? You, you traitor!

(The trio advances on MAGNETO.)

**Magneto**: Your majesty, all of this can be explained.

**Professor**: Brown nosers!

**Pietro**: Well, that's it--we're dead, forget about it. Just

dig a grave for both of us. We're dead.

(But MAGNETO sees the lighter in Gambit's pocket. He makes a move, but

is grabbed by brown nosers.)

**Professor**: Arrest Magneto at once.

**Magneto**: This is not done yet, boy!

(MAGNETO pulls a vial from his pocket. GAMBIT sees this and rushes

him, but MAGNETO throws the vial to the floor. A large red cloud

appears. When it is gone, so is MAGNETO.)

**Professor**: Find him, search everywhere!

**Gambit**: Rogue, are you all right?

**Rogue:** Yes.

(They lean in to kiss, but the PROFESSOR barges between them.)

**Professor**: Magneto, my most trusted counselor, plotting against

me all this time. Just horrible. How will I ever-

(He stops in mid sentence and looks at the pair.)

Can it be true? My daughter has finally chosen a

suitor? (She nods) Ha ha! Praise the Lord! You

brilliant boy, I could kiss you! I won't--I'll

leave that to my--. You two will be wed at once!

Yes, yes. And you'll be happy and prosperous, and

then my boy, you will be Headmaster!

**Gambit:** Headmaster?

**Professor**: Yes, a fine upstanding youth like yourself, a

person of your unimpeachable moral character is

exactly what this city needs! (GAMBIT looks

concerned at this.)


	14. Chapter 14

(Cut to int. of Magneto's chambers. MAGNETO and PIETRO enter.)

**Pietro**: We gotta get outta here! We gotta get-- I gotta

start packing. Only essentials.

(PIETRO starts throwing things into a suitcase.

MAGNETO smiles broadly.) Travel light! Bring the

guns, the weapons, the knives (Stops and takes out

a picture of himself and MAGNETO) and how about

this picture? I don't know--I think I'm making a

weird face in it. (MAGNETO starts to laugh wildly.)

Oh, boy--he's gone nuts. He's cracked. (PIETRO

flies down to him and knocks on his head.) Father?

Magneto? Get a grip, Father! (MAGNETO grabs him around

the neck) Good grip!

**Magneto**: Prince Ali is nothing more than that ragged urchin

Gambit. He has the lighter, Pietro.

**Pietro**: Why that miserable--

**Magneto**: But you are going to relieve him of it!

**Pietro**: Me?

(Cut to ext. of palace. GAMBIT is looking at the gardens.)

**Gambit**: Headmaster? They want me to be Headmaster?

(WOLVERINE comes out of lighter)

**Wolverine**: Yeah! You won her heart bub! (Turns into a

one-man band. He sees GAMBIT walk away with his

head hung. He stops, scratches his head, comes up

with an idea, then zooms over to GAMBIT. He holds

up his hands like a director scoping a picture and

we look through them.) Gambit, you've just won

the heart of the princess. What are you gonna do

next? (GAMBIT looks at him, then walks away in

sadness to the bed, where he falls on it and sighs.

WOLVERINE again is confused, then goes to him and pulls

out a script labeled "Gambit." Whispering: )

Psst, your line is "I'm going to free Wolverine."

Anytime.

**Gambit**: Wolverine...I can't.

**Wolverine**: Sure you can. You just go "Wolverine, I wish you

free." (He grabs Gambit's head and uses

him as a mock ventriloquist's dummy. GAMBIT pulls away.)

**Gambit**: I'm serious. Look, I'm sorry--I really am. But

they want to make me headmaster--no, They want to make

Prince Remy Professor. Without you, I'm just Gambit.

**Wolverine:** Remy, you won!

**Gambit**: Because of you! The only reason anyone thinks I'm

anything is because of you. What if they find out

I'm not really a prince? (Quietly) What if

Rogue finds out? I'll lose her. Wolverine, I can't

keep this up on my own. I can't wish you free.

**Wolverine**: (Sarcastically) Hey, I understand. After all,

you've lied to everyone else. Hey, I was beginning

to feel left out. Now, if you'll excuse me,

master. (He says the last word in disgust, then

poofs back into the lighter.)

(STORM and HARLEY are watching from the window.)

**Storm**: Ohhh.

**Gambit**: Wolverine, I'm really sorry. (Logan ignores him) Well, fine. (He slams

a pillow on top of the lighter.) Then just stay in

there! (He looks at STORM and HARLEY.) What are you

guys looking at? (They both leave.) Look, I--I'm

sorry. Wait, Storm-- wait--I'm sorry, I didn't--

wait, c'mon. (He sighs.) What am I doing?

Wolverine's right--I gotta tell Rogue the truth.

**Rogue**: (From a distance) Remy, oh Remy--will you come here?

**Gambit**: (Putting on his trench coat) Well, here goes. (He walks

into the garden.) Rogue? Where are you?

(We see PIETRO standing next to a FLAMINGO

in the pond. He is imitating Rogue's voice.)

**Pietro**: Ahem--In the Garden, hurry.

**Gambit**: I'm coming.

(We see GAMBIT hurry past, not noticing the birds or Pietro running past him really fast. PIETRO laughs, then runs into the mansion and finds the lighter under the pillow.) Boy, Magneto's

gonna be happy to see you! (Stretches his face

like Magneto's and imitates it.) Good work, Pietro!

(Normal) Ah, go on. (MAGNETO) No, really--on a scale

of one to ten, you are an eleven! (Normal) Ah,

Father--you're too kind. I'm embarrassed, I'm

blushing. (He flies away with the lamp.)


	15. Chapter 15

(Cut to the palace entrance. The PROFESSOR is standing on top, making

an announcement to the people.)

**Professor**: People of New York, Rogue has finally chosen a

suitor!

(Cut to behind the curtain, where ROGUE is peeking. GAMBIT

appears at the bottom of the stairs.)

**Gambit**: Rogue?

**Rogue**: Remy, where have you been?

**Gambit**: There's something I've got to tell you.

**Rogue**: The whole kingdom has turned out for the Professor's

announcement!

**Gambit**: No! But Rogue, listen to me, please!

**Rogue**: Good luck! (She pushes him out onto the platform

with the PROFESSOR, where he overlooks the entire

crowd.)

**Professor**: ...Remy LeBeau!

**Gambit**: Oh, boy!

(Far above, PIETRO and MAGNETO watch through a window.)

**Pietro**: Look at them, cheering that little pipsqueak.

**Magneto**: Let them cheer.

(He lifts the lighter and flicks it. WOLVERINE comes out.)

**Wolverine**: You know Remy, I'm getting (turns and sees MAGNETO)

reallyyyyyy--I don't think you're him. (He

descends and consults a playbill.) Tonight, the

role of Remy will be played by a tall, dark and

sinister ugly man with a helmet and perfect cape.

**Magneto**: I am your master now. (He throws WOLVERINE to the

ground and puts his foot on Wolverine's face.)

**Wolverine**: I was afraid of that.

**Magneto**: Wolverine, grant me my first wish. I wish to rule on

high, as Headmaster!

(Cut to ext where dark clouds circle the mansion. The mansion shakes.

The roof rips off and the PROFESSOR and GAMBIT duck.)

**Gambit**: Merde!

**Professor**: Bless my soul. What is this? What is going on?

(His blanket lifts off his lap. When he grabs it, his whole body

flies up, then is stripped of all his clothing except his boxer

shorts. The clothing reappears on MAGNETO.)

**Magneto**: Heh heh heh!

**Professor**: Magnus, you vile betrayer.

**Pietro**: That's Headmaster Vile Betrayer to you.

**Gambit**: Oh, yeah? Well, we'll just see about that! (reaches inside trench coat) The lighter!

**Magneto**: Finders-keepers, LeBooboo.

(They both look up and see a gigantic WOLVERINE lift the palace into

the clouds.. GAMBIT whistles and HARLEY drives up to greet him.

They drive up near the Wolverine's head.)

**Gambit**: Wolverine! No!

**Wolverine**: Sorry, kid--I got a new master now. (He places the

mansion on top of a mountain.)

**Professor**: Magneto, I order you to stop!

**Magneto**: There's a new order now--my order! Finally, you

will bow to me!

(The Professor bows, but Rogue does not.)

**Rogue**: We'll never bow to you!

**Pietro**: Why am I not surprised?

**Magneto**: If you will not bow before a Headmaster, then you will

cower before a mutant! (To Wolverine) Wolverine, my

second wish--I wish to be the most powerful

mutant in the world!

(Wolverine extends his finger. Gambit tries to stop him, but he cannot,

and another Wolverine (tm) brand lightning bolt strikes Magneto,

returning him to his normal look.)

**Pietro**: Ladies and gentlemen, a warm New York welcome for

Mutant Magneto!

**Magneto**: Now where were we? Ah, yes--abject humiliation!

(He zaps Rogue and the Professor with his powers, and

they both bow to him. Jean comes running at him.

He zaps Jean, and the Phoenix turns into Jean Grey.) Oh, princess--(lifts her chin

Using a magnetic field)--there's someone I'm dying to

introduce you to.

**Gambit:** (off-camera) Magneto! Get your hands off her!

(Magneto zaps Gambit. Harley flies away.)

**Magneto**: Prince Remy

Yes, it is he,

But not as you know him.

Read my lips and come to grips

With reality

(Magneto brings the two of them closer in the air.)

Yes, meet a blast from your past

Whose lies were too good to last

Say hello to your precious Prince Remy!

(Magneto zaps Remy back to Gambit.)

**Pietro**: Or should we say Gambit?

**Gambit**: Rogue, I tried to tell you.

**Magneto**: So Remy turns out to be merely a swamp rat

Just a con, need I go on?

Take it from me

His personality flaws

Give me adequate cause

To send him packing on a one-way trip

So his prospects take a terminal dip

His assets frozen, the venue chosen

Is the ends of the earth, whoopee!

So long,

**Pietro**: Good bye, see ya!

**Magneto**: Ex-Prince Remy!

(Magneto has zapped Storm back to normal. He sends the two of them into

a tall pillar, then launches it like a rocket, but not before

Harley can get in.)


	16. Chapter 16

(We see a snowy wasteland, where

the pillar crashes and rolls. It finally comes to a stop.

Gambit emerges, obviously very cold.)

**Gambit**: Storm? Storm! (He looks back at a shivering pile of

snow.) Oh, this is all my fault--I should have

freed Wolverine when I had the chance. (He digs

out Storm and puts his trench coat on her.) Storm!

Are you okay? I'm sorry, Storm--I made a mess of

everything, somehow. I gotta go back and set

things right. (He starts to walk through the snow,

and he eventually steps on a frozen Harley.)

Harley! (He looks up and sees Harley is pinned by

the pillar. He tugs to try and free Harley. He

can't do it, so he begins to remove snow from the

base of the pillar.) Storm, start digging! That's

it! (Finally, enough snow has been removed, and

the pillar begins to roll. Gambit runs away,

looks back, then slides into place. The pillar

rolls over him, and when it is gone, Gambit and

Storm are left sitting in the patch of snow made by

the window of the pillar.) Yeah! All right! (He

looks at his trench coat, made out of scared Storm who in her fear, glomped him.

Harley shakes off the snow and rushes over to pick

them up.) Now, back to New York! Let's go!


	17. Chapter 17

(We cut back to ext. long shot of New York, shrouded in red clouds.

Cut to int. and slow zoom of throne room. Pietro has the Professor

tied up like a marionette, and Rogue is chained next to the

throne.)

**Pietro**: Puppet headmaster want a bow pop? Here's your Blow pop.

Shove 'em all right down your throat. Here, have

lots!

(Magneto pulls the chain, and Rogue walks up to him holding an apple.)

**Rogue**: Leave him alone!

(Pietro stops for a second, then continues.)

**Magneto**: It pains me to see you reduced to this, Rogue.

(He takes a bite out of the apple she is holding.)

A beautiful southern belle such as yourself should be

on the arm of the most powerful man in the world.

(He waves his finger and a crown appears.) What do

you say, my dear? Why, with you as my queen...

(She picks up a glass of wine and throws it in his face.)

**Rogue**: Never!

**Magneto**: I'll teach you some respect! (She falls back as he

raises his hand to slap her. Then he stops.) No.

Wolverine, I have decided to make my final wish. I

wish for Princess Rogue to fall desperately in

love with me.

(We see Gambit race back into town.)

**Wolverine**: (Again as Beast) Ah, master-- there are a few

addendas, some quid pro quo-

**Magneto**: Don't talk back to me, you stupid blue lout! You

will do what I order you to do, animal!

(Rogue looks up and sees Gambit in the window, motioning her to

play along.)

**Rogue**: (She stands and puts the crown on her head.)

Magneto! I never realized how incredibly

handsome you are.

(Wolverine's jaw drops.)

**Magneto**: That's better. (He pulls Wolverine's jaw up like a

shade.) Now, pussycat, tell me more

about...myself.

**Rogue:** You're tall, well dressed...

(Magneto walks over to her. Gambit jumps down with Storm and Wolverine

sees them.)

**Wolverine**: Remy! Remy, bub! You're okay!

**Gambit**: Shh!

**Wolverine**: (Literally zips his mouth shut, then unzips it.)

Remy, I can't help you--I work for señor psychopath,

now. (His head turns into Magneto's, then back.)

**Gambit**: Hey--I'm a swamp rat, remember? (He re-zips Wolverine's

mouth.) I'll improvise.

(He slides down a pile of coins and hides close to Magneto and Rogue.

Magneto's back is to Gambit.)

**Magneto**: Go on.

**Rogue**: And your cape...is so...perfect! (She has her

arms around him. She pretends to twist with her

finger, but she is actually motioning for Gambit

to come over. He makes his move. Pietro sees him.)

**Pietro**: Fath--mmmmmm! (Storm grabs him and covers his mouth.)

**Magneto**: And the swamp rat?

**Rogue:** What swamp rat?

(They are about to kiss when Pietro manages to knock over a bowl. Magneto

turns to look, but Rogue grabs him back and kisses him. Gambit

looks disgusted. Pietro and Storm both look disgusted.)

**Storm**: Yuck!

**Magneto**: That was--(he sees Gambit's reflection in her

crown.) You! How many times do I have

to kill you, boy?

(He zaps Gambit. Rogue rushes him, and he throws her to the

ground. Gambit rushes and grabs the staff.)

**Gambit**: Get the lighter!

(Rogue runs to it. Magneto, however, shakes off Gambit, then

Uses powers to make an hourglass where Rogue is trapped.)

**Magneto**: Ah, ah, ah, princess--Your time is up!

(Sand begins to fall from the top onto her.)

**Gambit**: Chere!

**Pietro**: Oh, nice shot, fath-- (he is knocked out by Storm.)

(Storm rushes for the lighter.)

**Magneto**: Don't toy with me! (she's put into a box.)

**Gambit**: Storm!

(Harley rushes in.)

**Magneto**: Things are falling apart quickly, now boy. (Harley is

zapped and falls apart. Gambit again rushes for the

lighter.) Get the point? (His path is blocked by

large swords sticking in the floor. Magneto grabs

the lighter and laughs hideously. Gambit pulls a

sword out of the floor.) I'm just getting warmed

up! (He has Pyro make a ring of fire around Gambit.)

**Gambit**: Are you afraid to fight me yourself, you cowardly toad?

**Magneto**: A toad, am I? Perhaps you'd like to see how

toad-like my acolytes are! (He smiles broadly, and we

see a toad's tongue come out from behind him. Toad comes out from behind him, and the

ring of fire around Gambit becomes part of a metal

snake encircling Gambit. The snake Magneto makes

moves on Gambit, and on the third try, Gambit

throws a card and hits Magneto. Cut to Wolverine

cheerleaders wearing 'R' sweaters.)

**Wolverine**: Rickem, rockem, rackem, root--stick that sword into

that mut!

**Magneto**: You stay out of this!

(Wolverine waving a tiny pennant with a 'M' on it.)

**Wolverine**: (Weakly) Magneto, Magneto, he's our man--if he can't do it,

GREAT!

(Gambit uses the distraction to make a break for the hourglass where

Rogue is trapped. However, Magneto sees this and blocks the path.

Gambit is thrown away, and he loses his cards.)

**Rogue**: Gambit!

(Gambit jumps on a large gem and slides across the floor, grabbing

A deck of cards on his way. He turns a corner, but the pursuing snake

cannot, and the front half of the snake crashes through a wall and

hangs outside the palace. Gambit jumps up on the snake's back

and charges it. Magneto screams in agony. Gambit again tries to

free Rogue.)

**Gambit**: Hang on, chere!

(He is about to hit the glass with his **BO-STAFF** when Magneto grabs him.)

**Magneto**: (laughs hideously) You little fool! You thought

you could defeat the most powerful being on earth!

**Pietro**: (with Wolverine coming up behind him) Squeeze him,

father--Squeeze him like a--awk! (Wolverine elbows him

out of the way)

**Magneto**: Without Wolverine, boy, you're nothing!

**Gambit**: (Has an idea) Wolverine! Wolverine! Wolverine

has more power than you'll ever have!

**Magneto**: What!

**Gambit**: He gave you your power, he can take it away!

**Wolverine**: Remy, what are you doing? Why are you bringing me

into this? As if I don't have to take enough crap from him already…

**Gambit**: Face it, Magneto--you're still just second best!

**Magneto**: You're right! His power does exceed my own! But

not for long!

(Magneto circles around Wolverine.)

**Wolverine**: The kid is crazy. He's a little punch drunk. One

too many hits with the snake (His hand

turns into a snake and he hits his head with it.)

**Magneto**: Wolverine, I make my third wish! I wish to be an all

powerful Genie!

**Wolverine**: (Reluctantly) All right, your wish is my command.

Way to go, bub.

(Wolverine zaps Magneto with the last Wolverine (tm) brand lightning bolt.

Magneto's snake dissipates and he turns into a Genie. We

see Rogue's raised hand disappear under the sand. Gambit

runs over and finally smashes the glass. Sand and Rogue

pour out.)

**Magneto**: Yes! Yes! The power! The absolute power!

**Rogue**: (to Gambit) What have you done?

**Gambit**: Trust me!

(A purple lighter appears at Magneto's base. Magneto is busy conjuring.)

**Magneto**: The universe is mine to command, to control!

**Gambit**: Not so fast, Magneto! Aren't you forgetting something?

(Magneto looks down questioningly) You wanted to be a genie, you

got it! And everything that goes with it!

(Shackles appear on Magneto's wrists.)

**Magneto**: No! No!

**Pietro**: I'm gettin' out of here! Come on, you're the

genie, I don't want--

(Pietro tries to run away, but is sucked in with Magneto.)

**Gambit**: Phenomenal cosmic powers! Itty bitty living space.

**Wolverine**: Remy, you little genius, you!

(Storm turns back to normal, the Harley re-constructs, Rogue, the Professor

and Jean are standing together. Jean jumps up into the arms of

the Professor, then they are all transformed. The Professor is crushed

because of the weight of the new Jean. The mansion reappears

where it used to be in the city. Gambit is left holding the

new lighter.)

**Magneto**: (Both from inside the lighter.) Get your blasted foot

out of my face!

**Pietro**: Oh, shut up, you moron!

**Magneto**: Don't tell me to shut up!

**Pietro:**What are you going to do? Ground me?

**Wolverine**: Allow me. (He takes the lighter and goes to the

balcony. He is now wearing a baseball cap. He

winds up as if to throw the lighter, but opens his

palm flat and flicks it out into the desert

with his finger.) Ten- thousand years in a cave of

wonders ought to chill him out!

(Magneto and Pietro continue to argue as they fade out. Rogue walks

over to Gambit. They hold hands, but both look sad.)

**Gambit**: Rogue, I'm sorry I lied to you about being a

prince.

**Rogue**: I know why you did.

**Gambit**: Well, I guess...this... is goodbye? (Wolverine pokes

his head around the corner shocked at what he is

hearing.)

**Rogue**: Oh, that stupid law. This isn't fair--I love you.

**Wolverine**: (Wipes away a tear) Remy, no problem. You've still

got one wish left. Just say the word and you're a

prince again.

**Gambit**: But Wolverine, what about your freedom?

**Wolverine**: Hey, it's only an eternity of servitude. This is

love. (He leans down next to her.) Remy, you're

not gonna find another girl like her in a million

years. Believe me, I know. I've looked.

**Gambit**: Rogue, I do love you, but I've got to stop

pretending to be something I'm not.

**Rogue**: I understand.

(They take one final look into each other's eyes, then Gambit turns

to Wolverine.)

**Gambit**: Wolverine, I wish for your freedom.

**Wolverine**: One bona fide prince pedigree coming up. I--what?

**Gambit**: (He holds the lighter up to Wolverine.) Wolverine, you're

free!

(A transformation scene ensues, in which the shackles fall off

Wolverine's wrist and the lighter falls uselessly to the ground.

Wolverine picks it up and looks at it.)

**Wolverine**: (He can't believe it.) Heh, heh! I'm free. I'm

free. (He hands the lighter to Gambit.) Quick,

quick, wish for something outrageous. Say "I want

New Orleans." Wish for New Orleans. Try that!

**Gambit**: I wish for New Orleans.

**Wolverine**: No way! (Laughs hysterically. He bounces around

the balcony like a pinball.) Oh does that feel

good! I'm free! I'm free at last! I'm hittin'

the road. I'm going to a bar! I'm off to see the world! I--

(He is packing a suitcase, but looks down and sees Gambit looking

very sad.)

**Gambit:** Wolverine, I'm--I'm gonna miss you.

**Wolverine**: Me too, Remy. No matter what anybody says, you'll

always be a prince to me.

(They hug, then realize what they're doing and step back for a "manly handshake". The Professor steps forward.)

**Professor**: That's right. You've certainly proven your worth

as far as I'm concerned. It's that law that's the

problem.

**Rogue**: Professor?

**Professor**: Well, am I Professor or am I Professor? From this day

forth, the princess shall marry whomever she deems

worthy.

**Rogue**: (She smiles widely and runs into Gambit's arms.)

Him! I choose...I choose you, Gambit.

**Gambit**: Ha, ha. Call me Remy.

(They are about to kiss when giant blue hands pull everybody together.

Wolverine is decked out in a plaid shirt with cigars and a beer.)

**Wolverine**: Oh, all of yah. Come over here. Big group hug!

Mind if I kiss the goddess? (He kisses Storm.) Ooh,

a little too young! Well, I can't do any more damage around

this tavern. I'm outta here! See yah,

you two crazy lovebirds. Hey, Harley: Be seein' yah! I'm

a bad ass! No, I'm softie! No, I don't care

what I am--I'm free!

(Wolverine flies up into the blue sky leaving a trail of sparkles

behind him. They cut (a jump cut to make matters worse)

to fireworks exploding over a nightscape. We tilt down and see

Gambit and Rogue flying on Harley.)

**Gambit:** A whole new world

**Rogue**: A whole new life

**Both**: (with off-camera chorus) For you and me!

**Men's** **Chorus**: A whole new world!

(They fly off into the moonlight, and after they have disappeared,

the moon turns and reveals Wolverine's laughing face. Suddenly

the film is grabbed "off the projector", the Wolverine lifts it up

and looks at the audience.)

**Wolverine**: Made ya look, bub!

(Drops the film back to normal, with the normal moon. Fade to black.

The end.)


End file.
